Waiting for My First Period


My name is Seda Türkyilmaz, and I was born and raised in Hanover, Germany. At age 14, when I returned to school after summer holidays, some things looked different. The girls were taller, more mature and yes, they suddenly had boobs! During the breaks there was only one discussion topic: period. I was very curious and excited to hear the stories of my classmates and tried to imagine what it would be like to get my first period. One year passed, and I realized that I was physically behind all the girls. I still looked like a ten year-old girl.

Another year later at age 16, I was the only one in the class who didn’t have her period yet. And you cannot imagine how ashamed I was about that. I felt as if I wasn’t from planet earth. Something was not normal with me. Why me? I cried so many times in the school’s restroom. When I talked to my mother about my problem she recommended to go to doctor just to ask for a medical opinion. After blood tests and examination the German gynecologists said that this was normal. “Every woman has her own maturity rhythm. And yours is just a bit late. Nothing to be worried about.” I was so unsatisfied with this answer that I unfortunately started to lie, and told the girls at school that I finally had my period. I was not proud about lying but at that age this seemed to me the best solution.

You won’t believe this, but another 2 years passed and I still had not gotten my period. Psychologically, I was devastated. My body looked far from that of a young lady.  At almost 18 years old you don’t talk anymore with girlfriends about your first period, you talk about the first kiss or first boyfriend! I just listened and nodded my head. After a nervous breakdown my mother took me again to the doctor and she decided to treat me with a low hormone therapy in the next week. I was so happy and couldn’t wait to take the pills. My body was suddenly so released and filled with joy that, guess what? Yes, my first period started that day!

Two weeks before my 18th birthday I finally became a woman! I cannot describe how happy I was. Within a month I grew 20cm, and of course also all kind of feminine body parts matured. Today at age 35, I still feel gratitude every time I have my period. I will until I have my last period. I really don’t understand why so many women always complain about their period. Sure, it is not the most wonderful thing in the world but it is somehow a gift.

To me having the period does not only mean being fertile or capable to get pregnant. No, it’s more than that. Remember how it brought the girls together at the school breaks. It connects. We all share it.

Therefore, I support the PMSBOX project with all my heart. If it is a natural right to have period, than it must be also a natural right to have access to hygiene products. I wish the PMSBOX team all the best in their great mission. Thank you so much for giving me the opportunity to share this strange first-period story with your readers.

With love,

Seda from Istanbul

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Thank you Seda for sharing your story! If you would like to share your story on the PMSBOX blog, please contact info@pmsbox.co

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